Saturday, September 10, 2016

On World Suicide Prevention Day, It's Time to Be Real

Rogier Van Der Weyden's Deposition from the Cross speaks to the reality of grief and pain experienced in death.

            I remember it like it was yesterday, the day after my uncle committed suicide. My little brother got in the car with me at afterschool pickup and announced that Uncle John was in hell because he committed suicide. When mom asked where in the hell he got that from, Scott replied a teacher at our private Christian school had told him that. I credit that day being the day my theological wheels started turning. I wanted nothing to do with a god who would condemn his child, our beloved John to hell because of John’s illness and an action he took against himself. Little did I know that I too would face the reality of suicide personally.
There are some things in life that have been deemed unavoidable such as taxes and death. Unfortunately, some of us wish death to come by our own means and ways. We are in such a dark position and place that nothing can break into the darkness. No person or prayer can keep people from that darkness. And some of us wear the scars of suicide attempts either physically or mentally, some of us succeed and die far too soon.
            So on this World Suicide Prevention Day (September 10th) I want to remind you of the words of Scripture that I have come to know for myself. Romans 8 has this to say,
What then are we to say about these things? If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not withhold his own Son, but gave him up for all of us, will he not with him also give us everything else? Who will bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? It is Christ Jesus, who died, yes, who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who indeed intercedes for us. Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will hardship, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all day long; we are accounted as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
There is nothing, no one, no principality or power that can keep us from God’s love. If you are facing the dark abyss of suicide know that God stands with you and is for you. God gave us tools to face these realities, friends, family, clergy, psychologists, and psychiatrists, so use them to the best of your ability and fight the situation you are in. And when it seems like you can’t fight anymore lean into God and your support system to live on and live fully. This is easier said than done of course. But God is bigger than what we face, and we have the capacity to fight the dark reality of suicide.
            St. Francis De Sales (1567-1622) has this prayer I offer up today on World Suicide Prevention Day, “Be at Peace. Do not look forward in fear to the changes of life; rather look to them with full hope as they arise. God, whose very own you are, will deliver you from out of them. He has kept you hitherto, and He will lead you safely through all things; and when you cannot stand it, God will bury you in his arms. Do not fear what may happen tomorrow; the same everlasting God who cares for you today will take care of you then and every day.
God will either shield you from suffering, or will give you unfailing strength to bear it.
Be at peace, and put aside all anxious thoughts and imagination.
            I wish I could have one more conversation with my Uncle John, someone who, over the course of my life I’ve come to admire and adore. Though he was sick, he knows what I’ve gone through and I wish he had the resources I now have to fight the dying of the light. But perhaps John’s legacy and my legacy can be a vulnerability about this issue. I am a person who has faced suicide, and I know that through reaching out to my resources I have fought back, and you can too. So take heart, keep the faith, and never ever, ever, ever forget that you are loved.